SPARKLE DOUGHNUTS Will Cure Your Case of the Mondays (Or Not)

Sugar? Or shards of glass?

These can’t count as a Snack of the Afternoon (and I make up the rules!) because I saw them this morning, and I didn’t even BUY them. I have no idea how they taste. I’m not really a donut person.

And yes, I spell donut like that. But the sign at Starbucks said “Chocolate Mini Sparkle Doughnut,” so I will respect the sign. I am nothing if not respectful of what donuts– er, DOUGHNUTS– want to be called. Because they have feelings and all.

Anyway, yeah. I was kind of fascinated by the unexpected sparkle of the Peeps. And today at Starbucks the young woman in front of me in line pointed out the sparkle donuts (that’s really what they’re called! hahahahaha) and then laughed at me for taking a picture. But so what? I want to share this strange phenomenon with the masses. (Okay, the four people who read this.)

So how do we feel about sparkle doughnuts? Are they bringing joy to our humdrum lives? Does it make the corners of our mouths turn up– just a little– to know that they exist? Do they make you think of snow or angels or Christmas or miracles? (As a Jew from Southern California, I am familiar with very few of the above.)

I really have to wonder about the mouth-feel (YES, I watch “Top Chef,” I know that mouth-feel is a real term… and also a hilarious term). I have a feeling that the giant sugar-glass sprinkles that are causing the sparkle are also, like, SUPER crunchy. Like, uncomfortable. As in, how I feel when I say “sparkle” this many times in one post. (Did TWILIGHT ruin the word sparkle? Maybe for this decade… sigh.)


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